Three Tips To Take A Leap

I had lunch today with an old friend and colleague in Pittsburgh, catching up on life and work. Its probably been 18 months since we got together last. A great conversation, good to see him again and see how his kids are growing up so fast. He lives in Toronto and work brings him to Pittsburgh regularly, but this was the first time we had seen each other in ages. Conversation turned to business and while I won’t share the context of our (private) lunch, I was reminded of three key lessons that life has taught my friend and I since we first met as colleagues in Brussels in the 90s.People are afraid to fail. Its like the “f” word that is more obscene and crude than the other, more well known “f” word. What is our obsession with failure? People see failure as a colossal mistake, a black mark on their record. It’s not. When I start something new, I feel like I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. What would happen if it failed? Guess what? I’ve been there, I have failed (horror!). Big deal.

You get up to the plate, swing for the fences, and sometimes you miss. I’m not a baseball fan, I hate the sport (you would too if you ever lived in Pittsburgh where the pitiful Pirates play), but I love baseball analogies and stories. Everyone knows Babe Ruth is famous for his home run record, but did you know he also held the record for strikeouts for decades? Babe once said, “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” So true…

There are three key lessons I have learnt in life that are proving priceless when it comes to seeking success:

Learn. Approach everything in life as a learning experience. Especially a new venture, project or activity. People pay hundreds of thousands of dollars and spend years in college to get the same education you can get from the real world. Its almost ironic that we are programmed to study for years and get that Masters degree or PHD, only so we can experience it for real later in life. You have to approach the world and your venture as a learning experience, an opportunity like going to school. You must be open to learning and growing. Regardless of what happens with this venture or activity, you can take what you’ve learned and apply it to the next thing for the rest of your life.

Don’t burn bridges. “Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.” Actor/comedian Jimmy Durante’s timeless quote is as valid for you and me as it is for the movers and shakers of industry and politics. Whatever you do, treat others with respect. Don’t lie or take advantage of them or of a situation. Deals go bad all the time, but relationships shouldn’t. Protect your reputation. It’s a small world and it’s getting smaller. Bad relationships are likely to come back to haunt you. Be honorable and professional.

Network. A CEO I once worked for taught me what it really means to network. Too many people think networking is for outgoing extroverts. They are wrong. Networking is an activity everyone must commit to and do in order to build their personal brand. Everything you do – professional or personal - will lead you to new people. Don’t be casual about the relationships you form - be proactive. Everyone you meet has the opportunity to teach you something. Learn from their successes and failures. Everyone you meet has the opportunity to introduce you to someone else who can help you - maybe not today and maybe not with this venture, but maybe a year from now in a completely unrelated venture. Be aware of those connections and maintain them. And be natural, its not forced.

These three lessons should be ingrained in all of us who want to better ourselves, no matter what field or goal we are chasing. I think about the difference between people who make it happen for themselves and those who let things happen to them. The proactive ones are active networkers who build bridges with everyone they meet and have a passion for learning from everything around them.

And if you have a fear of failure – be it starting a business, public speaking, taking more responsibility etc. – you will not get ahead if you are not willing to take a chance and make it happen for yourself, even if it means failing. Its much easier to stay at home, to read a novel, watch TV, or surf Facebook than it is to take chances. But this risk-adverse thinking will, at best, keep you right where you are and, more likely, cause you to slowly fall farther and farther behind.

As I have said all along in this blog, life is about taking chances, its about exploring the unknown and taking a long-term approach. I encourage you to seek these chances and make it happen for yourself. Just know that you will swing and you will miss. It doesn’t matter how gifted you are or how many personal development books you read. But, and this is key, a swing and a miss is not a failure when you live by the three lessons above.